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Old 11-09-2012, 08:28 PM   #1
havoc
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Whats ur worst experience with girls?

get invited to a house party
do NOT want to go because i know how it ends
friends managed to convince me to go
be on a house 4 girls / 4 guys
listening music, playing and talking
friends start to flirting with the girls and i tried to talk and be cool too
girls show interest in cute friends but they barely talk to me
they start playing spin the bottle;when it was my turn to kiss a girl and the girl said she didn't wanted to play anymore


MOVIE TIME ! Some stupid comedy called "MacGruber"
girls keep flirting with my friends
my friends start making out
kisses noises, uncomfortable situation as fuck, but at least there was another girl at the other side of the room who was also alone
alone girl start sending texts and in minutes a guy pass to pick her up
OH FUCK
i can't leave the house since i don't have a car and the house is like 50 miles from home
watching MacGruber, almost crying in forever alone pain
suddenly i heart fuck noises, i know how it sound because of pr0n
my friends started to fuck the girls right there under blankets
they even exchange the girls


i hid on a bathroom and waited there for about 6 hours, i had to sleep on the bathtub
returning home kids were talking about the girls and how slutty they were
finally safe at home
cried a river, fapped and tried to kill myself with dad gun, but didn't dare, too pussy, maybe next time
go to sleep
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Old 11-09-2012, 08:32 PM   #2
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marriage
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Old 11-09-2012, 08:35 PM   #3
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Once, I met a female.
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Old 11-09-2012, 08:48 PM   #4
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I was hugging/cuddling a girl in bed, nude, i squeezed her a little and she farted.
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Old 11-09-2012, 08:55 PM   #5
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Old 11-09-2012, 09:02 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Goaters View Post
I was hugging/cuddling a girl in bed, nude, i squeezed her a little and she farted.
A married, 37 year old middle school teacher farted while giving me a BJ. Seriously. We broke up last week though :,( but hey at least I got 10 seasons of Frasier DVD's out of it!

Last edited by Popegina; 11-09-2012 at 09:54 PM..
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Old 11-09-2012, 09:07 PM   #7
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This is my story, not copypasta btw. this is the short version, posted longer version on the btbam forum a few years ago.



>>be 20
>>just got off break with gf of 3.5 years
>>go to "party" with 2 friends, one is 26 and the other is my age
>>no idea whose house it is, roll up and find out its 3 girls around my age, an older sister and her bf
>>smoke a few bowls and just bullshit
>>friends start to flirt with 2 girls, don't bother with 3rd girl because she's a total slut and really didn't care
>>3rd girl mentions something about her black ex bf calling her up to other friends, and showing them her phone
>>friends slowly disappear one by one.
>>left with 3rd girl alone
>>she starts getting close to me and compliments me
>>grabs hand and puts on stomach
>>says "this is what an abortion does to your stomach"
>>mfw
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Old 11-09-2012, 09:14 PM   #8
Dysrhythmia
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Quote:
Originally Posted by havoc View Post
get invited to a house party
do NOT want to go because i know how it ends
friends managed to convince me to go
be on a house 4 girls / 4 guys
listening music, playing and talking
friends start to flirting with the girls and i tried to talk and be cool too
girls show interest in cute friends but they barely talk to me
they start playing spin the bottle;when it was my turn to kiss a girl and the girl said she didn't wanted to play anymore


MOVIE TIME ! Some stupid comedy called "MacGruber"
girls keep flirting with my friends
my friends start making out
kisses noises, uncomfortable situation as fuck, but at least there was another girl at the other side of the room who was also alone
alone girl start sending texts and in minutes a guy pass to pick her up
OH FUCK
i can't leave the house since i don't have a car and the house is like 50 miles from home
watching MacGruber, almost crying in forever alone pain
suddenly i heart fuck noises, i know how it sound because of pr0n
my friends started to fuck the girls right there under blankets
they even exchange the girls


i hid on a bathroom and waited there for about 6 hours, i had to sleep on the bathtub
returning home kids were talking about the girls and how slutty they were
finally safe at home
cried a river, fapped and tried to kill myself with dad gun, but didn't dare, too pussy, maybe next time
go to sleep
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Old 11-09-2012, 09:16 PM   #9
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Sick fingers in butt to loosen for anal, poop in dere.
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Old 11-09-2012, 09:23 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Schwenger View Post
>>grabs hand and puts on stomach
>>says "this is what an abortion does to your stomach"
Holy shit, I can't think of a better pick up line than that.
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Old 11-09-2012, 09:32 PM   #11
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was gonna say: this all needs to be in green text. Don't skimp on the mfw's.
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Old 11-09-2012, 09:35 PM   #12
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My ex-girlfriend cheated on me but I didn't find out until wayyyyyyyy later through a random friend of mine who goes to school with her.
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Old 11-09-2012, 09:49 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hasu View Post
was gonna say: this all needs to be in green text. Don't skimp on the mfw's.
Quote:
Originally Posted by FreshFlesh View Post
Sick fingers in butt to loosen for anal, poop in dere.
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Old 11-09-2012, 10:01 PM   #14
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>be now
>No gf for five or six years
>Depressed for seven years
>Too beta to go after any girl
>Girl I know teases me a lot and plays games on me
>Never seem to be able to kick that football
>Makes me want to punch my dumb dog straight in his stupid little shit face
>mfw






















































































(first half true, though)

Last edited by DrippingInsanity; 11-10-2012 at 11:23 AM..
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Old 11-09-2012, 11:35 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FreshFlesh View Post
Sick fingers in butt to loosen for anal, poop in dere.
Well, at least you got to check her for hemorrhoids...

Last edited by Robinator; 11-09-2012 at 11:37 PM..
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Old 11-09-2012, 11:51 PM   #16
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getting stood up on a date but then again i found a new girl that night at the bar lol.
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Old 11-09-2012, 11:54 PM   #17
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getting friendzoned
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Old 11-10-2012, 12:03 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShadowHunter View Post
getting friendzoned
THIS

>be this semester
>talkin to some chick
>get friendzoned pretty quickly
>tfw
>she still comes to see my bands shows and texts me randomly but then completely deads me at other times like a scunt
>still like her cuz i'm pathetic
>some other chick develops crush on me (i know this cuz it was obvious since last semester and her best friend straight up told me a few days ago)
>that girl tells me that SHE has feeling for me now
>i now have two girls i am not interested in all over me

i might as well get a threesome out of this
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Old 11-10-2012, 12:54 AM   #19
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>this semester
>meet a really cool girl who is attractive, has good music taste, is intelligent
>mutual flirting and connection going on at all times with her
>she has a boyfriend back in france (she's french like me)
>have sex with her one night drunk, and again the next day after waking up
>she tells me that her relationship with her boyfriend is serious and that we cannot ever tell anyone this happened
>I have legit feelings for this girl by now and so now it blows really hard cause we're always flirty again but only friends
>Same fucking scenario happens two weeks later with a different girl, except that this one is danish and her boyfriend is here in montreal
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Old 11-10-2012, 01:04 AM   #20
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>this last Summer in a small village in France
>taking a walk at night
>come across a middle-aged woman with girthy, child-bearing hippopotamus hips
>actually sorta resembled what would happen if a wildebeest mated with a beached whale
>love at first site
>we sexed all night
>she tells me that she's Cedric's mom and that his step-dad is out of town
>I instantly left
>noticed I had herpes
>forever alone herpes
>fin
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Old 11-10-2012, 01:19 AM   #21
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Old 11-10-2012, 01:47 AM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShadowHunter View Post
getting friendzoned
Wow, M Knight shit right there

My worst experience with females is them wanting to be fag hags, the subtext to that being them wanting to fuck because they need to vent sexual frustration in a way where there's no risk of getting romantically or emotionally attached (I see this shit happen way too much).

Last edited by Skeetsystem; 11-10-2012 at 02:21 AM..
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Old 11-10-2012, 02:31 AM   #23
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Here's a story I've never told anyone besides my fiance. It's pretty fucked up and I still think about it once in a while, but since I like reading other people's stories, here is mine.

too lazy to >> and greentext but use your imagination

When I was 13 or 14 I was pretty depressed (parents divorcing, not too many friends, lonely, angst etc...) and I started hanging out in a p2p file sharing program metal chatroom. Met this girl who told me she was 21. Me being a young, stupid teenage boy I thought this was awesome and didn't raise any red flags. Started talking for a week or so on msn messenger privately (this was before myspace was big) so I only had a single picture of her and this was before most people had digital cameras/cameraphones. I was naive and trusted her so I sent her a pic of myself. Another couple of weeks later we start talking on the phone all the time. Nothing in specific, just talking about random stuff for hours. We started talking about sexual stuff eventually (use your imagination) and even had plans on meeting up when I got my license/car, (lol). One day I call her and something is seriously wrong. She keeps saying incoherent things, laughing and forgetting what I was saying to her. I was freaking out thinking something was wrong but eventually had to hang up on her after she started crying. Didn't call her until a couple of days passed and no one answers her house phone. After a few days I finally get through to her mother and she tells me the truth. This 21 year old girl was actually almost 30, already had two kids, didn't look anything like the pictures she sent and was currently in jail for breaking her probation (she had been smoking pot and that weird phone call was her high on acid) and she was addicted to painkillers (percs). Completely violated my trust but tried to put it behind me. Didn't realize until a few years later that I was pretty much sexually assaulted and taken advantage of and how fucked up the situation was. A couple of years later she gets out, I googled her old email and found out she was already married with another kid on the way. I wanted to message her current husband that she completely took advantage of a 14 year kid but for some reason never did. Still remember her old email and occasionally search her old name to try to ruin her life.


Last edited by strychnine; 11-10-2012 at 02:35 AM..
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Old 11-10-2012, 03:30 AM   #24
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>>in high school. Mostly the same as I am now but with shittier music.
>>widely lusted after hot chick happens to be in computers class with me.
>>sits next to me, copies work because I finish first and play CS lolol
>>very quickly escalates to flirting which I am oblivious to. At one point her gams were on my lap. -continues with classwork-
>>friends constantly(even today) told me she was hitting on me and I could've easily tapped that.
>>2012 with no booty to my name always wondering what could've been if I had that bang.
>>mfw



not that bad I know, just something I really kick myself over for being so oblivious to.
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Old 11-10-2012, 04:17 AM   #25
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Originally Posted by Skeetsystem View Post
Wow, M Knight shit right there
who the fuck is M Knight?
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Old 11-10-2012, 05:41 AM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DrippingInsanity View Post
>be now
>No gf for five or six years
>Depressed for seven years
>Too beta to go after any girl
>Girl I know teases me a lot and plays games on me
>Never seem to be able to kick that football
>Makes me want to punch my dumb dog straight in his stupid little shit face
>mfw
similar feel over here

add
>still contact with ex, she recently decides to tell me I┤m love of life LOL
>new girl pops up, potentially insane, but kind cute/cool
>lots of feels but no gain
>going to eat pizza and buy some cds to cope
:willram

Last edited by Grindmasterflesh; 11-10-2012 at 05:43 AM..
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Old 11-10-2012, 07:13 AM   #27
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getting friendzoned
this.
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Old 11-10-2012, 07:57 AM   #28
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I wanted to fuck this girl for a few months but it just never happened... This one night I say "fuck it, it's not happening! I'm just going to eat all this acid" ...2 hours later I'm in the back seat of a car with her and she starts kissing my neck... All I can do is laugh. I think she eventually realizes how high I am but I don't know, I already fucked off to some acid party to trip. Not sure what ever happened to the bitch.
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Old 11-10-2012, 08:01 AM   #29
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It's 5am in San Jose and this thread went from LOLto >>baww.
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Old 11-10-2012, 08:59 AM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Schwenger View Post
Here's a story I've never told anyone besides my fiance. It's pretty fucked up and I still think about it once in a while, but since I like reading other people's stories, here is mine.

too lazy to >> and greentext but use your imagination

When I was 13 or 14 I was pretty depressed (parents divorcing, not too many friends, lonely, angst etc...) and I started hanging out in a p2p file sharing program metal chatroom. Met this girl who told me she was 21. Me being a young, stupid teenage boy I thought this was awesome and didn't raise any red flags. Started talking for a week or so on msn messenger privately (this was before myspace was big) so I only had a single picture of her and this was before most people had digital cameras/cameraphones. I was naive and trusted her so I sent her a pic of myself. Another couple of weeks later we start talking on the phone all the time. Nothing in specific, just talking about random stuff for hours. We started talking about sexual stuff eventually (use your imagination) and even had plans on meeting up when I got my license/car, (lol). One day I call her and something is seriously wrong. She keeps saying incoherent things, laughing and forgetting what I was saying to her. I was freaking out thinking something was wrong but eventually had to hang up on her after she started crying. Didn't call her until a couple of days passed and no one answers her house phone. After a few days I finally get through to her mother and she tells me the truth. This 21 year old girl was actually almost 30, already had two kids, didn't look anything like the pictures she sent and was currently in jail for breaking her probation (she had been smoking pot and that weird phone call was her high on acid) and she was addicted to painkillers (percs). Completely violated my trust but tried to put it behind me. Didn't realize until a few years later that I was pretty much sexually assaulted and taken advantage of and how fucked up the situation was. A couple of years later she gets out, I googled her old email and found out she was already married with another kid on the way. I wanted to message her current husband that she completely took advantage of a 14 year kid but for some reason never did. Still remember her old email and occasionally search her old name to try to ruin her life.

I have this friend who had some way worse shit coming to him in a similar way at a young age. try to leave it behind. crazy shit.
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