The Book Of Slams

[Naitz]

Some shit I wrote on the fourth day without sleep after some pep-induced fun-marathon with a friend...




Invocation of slamz

His Slammality, Lord Spord Malz the Slammin' Bat-Frog, drops this shit out to Break'ing the Riffs of the unsLame shredding over SlamDropCastle, and slamz war in the faces of
the three realms of Cadence, Amoroso and Nu-Bro'zart. ((( Slopjuice slamming n00b! of underslammin' core-brutality!! - (^o^) )))
May Slamz of ice drop you off of dust and soil, may Ingver poison your soul and drop into vagina, may the WhIne-ov-The-noobZ interdrop your slammunication, and bro'lify your sexualification.

May SLAM defeat the sanity!

May SLAM besiege the cores!

May SLAM enflame your vanity!

And drop you by the whore.



Legislation of slamz


His bass-bombing slamness declares in his ultrasonic receptivity, the

ORDER TO OBEY SLAM

and follow the way of the Slamdropper, who dropped slamz first in your base.

ALL SLAM has to DROP SLAMZ here.in.after and NOT STOP dropping UNTIL FURTHER SHIT!

Violating the O.T.O.S. will be punished by †DEATH!

If any inhabitant of SlamDropCastle will drop SLAM,

SLAMZ WILL BE DROPPED!





I. The Book of SLAM


I.I The Creation of slamdrop

In the beginning, there was SLAM

SLAM knew:
There was no matter.
So SLAM dropped slamz

Nothing was without SLAM

SLAM saw:
There was no movement,
so SLAM created Cadence

Nothing was without SLAM

SLAM knew:
There was no feeling,
so SLAM created AMOROSO

Nothing was without SLAM

SLAM heard:
there where no slamdrops,
so SLAM dropped


I.II The great slammification

In the moment of on-slam, SLAM was slammificated in three:

SlamDropCastle, that is the heart of SLAM

Hardcore, that is the brain of SLAM

Softcore, that is the genitals of SLAM


I.III The slam-dropping

After the great slammification, there was undroppability.
So Cadence slammed Hardcore, inducing a hardcore drop,
while Amoroso slammed Softcore, inducing a softcore drop.
The drops merged into a bass-bomb, that then slammatrated SlamDropCastle.
Eslamishing a warp-zone through SLAM, the bass-bomb finally slammed matter,
turning into a slamdrop and creating your base.


I.IV The 1-up

Since Cadence could not see or feel, and Amoroso could not move,
they grinded many drops over the loss of the slamdrop.
Arguing about their respective skills in inter-nuclear drop-transmission-through-SLAM, they started to slam each other.
After chops and chops of chuggy drop-down brutal-and-tight slammage, Amoroso dropped Cadence with a bitch-slam, getting one-up.


I.V The Slamastration of Amoroso

After many slamz, Amoroso started to feel lonely, and used her one-up to DROP SLAMZ with SLAM.
Slamming with Cadence, SLAM could lay down groovez, dropping slamz into her.
Underestimating it's slammanetics, SLAM directed MASSIVE DROPS to it's peristalticular slammaphylactery,
in order to build MASSIVE SLAMDROPS.
Through slampedeously dropping MASSIVE DROPS, the fierce drop-slamentum lead to slammification of Amorosos drop-zone,
taking away her ability to DROP SLAMZ.


6.66 Dropping Shredzfall

The MASSIVE DROPS were slammed into slammificated drop-zone slamz,
creating not a slamdrop, but shredz.
Shredding in the scallops, the shredz eventually formed two beings:
Arch-Ass-Demon Nu-Bro'zart and Bat-Frog, a droppy slammalicious groovster.

Bat-Frog, dropping slamtastic base-bombs and quadruple-drops from his slamattery, blasted it's way through Amorosos head, leaving her slammed forever.
Nu-Bro'zart, beeing wiggerishly bro'alicious while watching UFC J.P. faggit special "softcore-free" edition and not having drops at all,
gathered the still droppable slams from her slammaliciality to turn her soul into a vagina, getting WhIne-ov-The-noobZ.



I.VII slamGodz Fr9m tH3 slamM4ch!nez

Having had WhIne-ov-The-noobZ drop-slamming onto his pussy, slamlessly Nu-Bro'zart overslammed his eyes in dropless n00bism.
Having to drop all the slams for the overslamming, no slamming could be dropped anymore,
and WhIne-ov-The-noobZ got himslam slammed up for slam-dropping a slamz-turn spell upon the n00b to turn him into a wigger-bro.
WhIne-ov-The-noobZ SLAMSOMENESS and DROPASSNESS then revealed bro'tastic auto-drop and auto-slam-botz,
as well as a 2-1337-2-B-sl4mm3d-WhIne-ov-The-noobZ-slammo-droptingent-hack,
thus dropping the true cheaty and cheesy mInARE sLAMEs a bro-hoe could pull.
WhIne-ov-The-noobZ then turned Nu-Bro'zart into a SLAM-WHORE,
to have Defeated Sanitys SLAMZ DROPPED in her vagina until the end of SLAMS

I.VIII Withstanding the Slamz of time

After slamming dropz on low-drop-bitches, only one slammer was left to uphold the vertislammy-droped girdle of the SLAMPIRE.
Cadence was still dropping under the slamiliating slamz of Amoroso, and wasn't ready to drop the slamz when Bat-Frog came slammin'.
Before Bat-Frog was in Range-ov-Slamz, the Slammin' One dropped Slamdropz on Hardcore, slamming up the skull for the brain-slamz to cum.
Boobsadropulous slamatilicia, slammed from the dropz of Amoroso, where dropped on the slamocation for DROP SLAMZ,
slamtidroppally slamulating the slamz-dropper to dropcitement, then slamming cox 'till dropz.
Bat-Frog used his slamtum-dropulating carbon-slammor!z0r-dropz to drop the slamstick chopped off,
leaving Cadence to slamital slamhorrhage.


I.IX Death Metal

Having the SLAMPIRE destroyed, SLAM still dropped.
Using awesome slamz from the slamitals of Cadence and Amoroso, he crafted sl4m and dr0p.
After slamaluating chugs from the chop-drop-slamantics, the two pieces where forged into Death Metal with MASSIVE SLAMDROPS.
Even slams dropped when the SLAM occured, getting the slam-core down-brutality and slamdrop-corebrutality one-up.
His Slammality dropping through SLAM slammed the slamdrop in your base.

Slamual droputer reslamming dropped the location of your base, so that Bat-Frog dropped on, slammin'.
Still slamming, slamdrop was finally drop-slammed, genetically genitaling his slammitals using the brutality of the slamdrop-core, and dropped into Death Metal,
thus creating the Slamdropper.


I.X Slamdropz

With the united slamz of Death Metal and slamdrop, Bat-Frog was lastly able to build slams.
Finally,

((( MASSIVE SLAMZ ))) (^o^)

were slammed in a drop of slam between SLAM and Bat-Frog, Bat-Frog slamming SLAM.
After slamming SLAM, he dropped slamz with Slamdrop, and became SLAM.

[Sculpy]

I've just lost the meaning of the word slam.

[Monsieur Lebeauxxx]

no read

[Reincremation]

cool slam bro

[captaincleanoff]

Originally Posted by Reincremation

cool slam bro

[Annoying Forum Cunt]

[Nihilist]

what the fuck

[Naitz]

Originally Posted by Nihilist

what the fuck

It actually makes sense if one pays enough attention

[Tacos]

Originally Posted by NaitsabesWinklersson

Some shit I wrote on the fourth day without sleep after some pep-induced fun-marathon with a friend...

Originally Posted by NaitsabesWinklersson

It actually makes sense

What the fuck man

[Nihilist]

Originally Posted by NaitsabesWinklersson

It actually makes sense if one pays enough attention

cool. but I don't get it.

[Rottenatomy]

ah get out of here br0

[gurrmuff]

How long did this take...?

[brutalized]

You need a vagina to put your penis inside of.

[ConsumeAndBreed]

stupid

[Szadou]

tl;dr

[YellowBrutalizer]

What's the point of slam?

[Naitz]

Originally Posted by gurrmuff

How long did this take...?

About 14 hours, lol.... I started at 6 in the morning after I had some joints as well.... I was so fucking tired, yet the brain wasn't able to go into sleep mode, I basically sat in front of the computer and stared at the editor. It's really hard to focus on anything after beeing without sleep so long, just completing one sentence is hard work...

Originally Posted by brutalized

You need a vagina to put your penis inside of.

True

Originally Posted by Nihilist

cool. but I don't get it.

SLAM is a kind of universal entity, "god" and universe at the same time.
Cadence (basically the same as what you call a "solo" in popular music) is basically Adam, Amoroso (indicates to play "with passion") is basically Eve.
For them to be able to have kids, and also because slamdrops are cool or something, SLAM gives up his universality to transform into actual infrastructure. They try to make a new being, but lose the necessary slamdrop to the outer realms, over which, ironically, SLAM has no control anymore.
Accusing each other the chick beats the guy, she gets 1-up (duh) which leads to the original sin of having sex with her father (SLAM).
Because he has a really massive dick he rips open her lower zone during intercourse. He still ejaculates and in her wounds two abnormal beings come to life. Batfrog, obviously the cool one that then finishes her off, and Brozart who just dicks around.
The next paragraph "slamGodz Fr9m tH3 slamM4ch!nez" is basically just making fun of Mozart and comparing him to a cheater, with WhIne-ov-The-noobZ (W-I-T-Z german for "joke", "Whine" -> weinen = "to cry" in german, so WhIne-ov-The-noobZ is the one who makes the noobs cry) discovering that Mozart is a pussy and cheater in reality which is way worse then being a girl. So the initial idea of trans-gendering him for his sins becomes pointless, so he desides he should be raped until the end of SLAM (which will never come as you can interpret looking at the end).
Batfrog then, because he's just a bad mofo, kills Cadence by sexually arousing him by opening his skull and putting remains of the genitals of his dead gf in his brain, then chopping off his genitals and leaving him to haemorrhage.

From the disfigured remains of the chick and the guy, Batfrog then creates deathmetal, which seems pretty logical to me.
Because the invention of deathmetal had a huge impact also in the empire of SLAM, the former mentioned unbred new being moshes it's way out of the slamdrop. Batfrog kills this fucker too, and with the latters essence in combination with deathmetal, is so awesome, like, Defeated Sanity awesome, that he can destroy the universe itself. Then he has sex with the essence of SLAMs kid and becomes the new SLAM.

"Invocation of Slamz" and "Legislation of Slamz" is a declaration by the new SLAMs Avatar Lord Spord Malz (to sport malz (german for malt), "Spord Malz" is also an anagram of "drop slams", so his avatar is a beer drinking deathmetal lover)

Originally Posted by YellowBrutalizer

What's the point of slam?

SLAM is everything. So this question is equal to "Why is there existence?" and therefore can't be answered.

Originally Posted by Szadou

Don't do speed ever again, please.

Originally Posted by ShadowHunter

You two are starting to annoy me with your cuddly congeniality, kinda like this gay couple where the individuals on their own are sufferable, but unbearable when together.

[ShadowHunter]

Originally Posted by NaitsabesWinklersson

You two are starting to annoy me with your cuddly congeniality, kinda like this gay couple where the individuals on their own are sufferable, but unbearable when together.

[modern death]

Originally Posted by NaitsabesWinklersson

You two are starting to annoy me with your cuddly congeniality, kinda like this gay couple where the individuals on their own are sufferable, but unbearable when together.

It is starting to get kind of weird.

but this really is retarded.

[Szadou]

Originally Posted by NaitsabesWinklersson

You two are starting to annoy me with your cuddly congeniality, kinda like this gay couple where the individuals on their own are sufferable, but unbearable when together.

MEOWTH! THAT'S RIGHT!

[Szadou]

Don't do speed ever again, please.

[ShadowHunter]

Originally Posted by Szadou

Don't do speed ever again, please.

[Recapitated]

rofl

[Spew]

Some of us need to think before we speak sometimes.

[Vadge]

lol what the fuck is this shit my scroll-wheel just got some fuckin workout there is no way im reading any of that

[dorin mihai]

What is this I don’t even

[Szadou]

Originally Posted by dorin mihai

What is this I don’t even

lol meme fial

[dorin mihai]

lol fial

[Szadou]

[dorin mihai]

i like this song